The key to wearing sweater dresses is that they need to be the right material (THICK) and the right length (not tunic short and not past-knee Mormon long).
I have a few sweater dresses that I wanted to wear this week, but when I took them out of their summer storage facility, i.e. a giant laundry bag in the hall closet where I'd shoved everything woolen, they had somehow magically gotten shorter.
You might say that maybe my ass not-so-magically got wider so there isn't as much material to go around, but I maintain the laundry bag shortening theory.
Anyway, time for new sweater dresses. Ones that don't show the crotch seams of my tights when I bend over.
I think that is my rubric now.
Acceptable sweater dresses:
E is going to love this one, so I should say right off the bat that I can't wear this because it is wool and itchy! But someone who can wear wool, please go buy this! It is adorable. I would love it with white cabled tights or gray tights and tall tan flat boots.
Unlike a lot of sweater dresses, this one doesn't hug your legs past your hips, and instead flares out which is much more flattering and much less likely to ride up and show your crotch seams.
This dress passes the test because it has a fun pattern that distracts the eye from bulges.
This clingy dress has a long stripe down the front which makes you look narrow and lean.
(Sorry for these small images, Macy's website sucks)
This one also confuses the eye and has a flattering white triangle that makes you look like your waist is small.
I like the length on this one and believe that it would not show my crotch. It's a classic, with the wide chunky cables and the foldover collar with buttons. I want to go touch this one and see if it is going to be itchy. It's a wool/cashmere/other crap blend, so there is hope. It also comes in charcoal which I like just as much as this cream one.
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