Barefoot running shoes that won't embarrass your friends

Ok, so this whole barefoot running movement has taken off and in principle, I support people using their natural muscles and not screwing up their gait and getting injured, but in actuality, I cannot STAND those terrible finger toe shoes.

Don't be an embarrassment to your family. Wear some of these instead and pass for human.
Thank you.

$97 Dash RunAmoc lite
These look like sneakers but are thin and have perforated leather that lets your feet breathe (read: sweat freely).

$97 Dash RunAmoc range and turquoise suede
You can still be a little funky if you want and draw some attention to your shoes so people can ask about them and then you can spout off for 30 min about the barefoot movement. These would be perfect for that purpose.

$112 Customized SoftStar barefoot shoes
You can choose your colors, whether you want leather, suede, or perforated leather, and the whole style of the shoe. Make them just as terrible as you want. They will still not be as awful as those fingerfeet.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!