Monday, June 4, 2012

Etsy Find of the Day: Snowboard coffee table ??

$249 Snowboard coffee table

I am tempted to just leave this here and see if one of you idiots will buy it.

Instead, what I think I'll do is tell the story of how I think this item came to be for sale on our lovely Etsy.

First, let's start with a great line from the description:
"would be great in front of the couch as a coffee table or anywhere a unique table would be suited."

I'd translate that as "Fucking just stick it in your house somewhere so I can get rid of it."

Next, let's move on to:
"Sturdily constructed with a brand new snowboard and Eames / mid century modern style hairpin legs"

Brand new, huh?
I don't think so.
I think someone got a little ahead of themselves and decided they were really tough and they could handle extreme sports. And instead of renting a board, they decided to screw it and just get this really awesome board they say, because, dude, I'm just going to need one soon anyway. And this one totally speaks to me, man.
Two bruised ribs and a broken tailbone later, someone realizes (or his wife tells him) that this should really not be in the house anymore because it's never going to be used again.

But what to do with it?
Selling it as is would be so boring.
I know, let's stick some crappy legs from the hardware store on it!
What is it? What do you mean, what is is? It's... uhh... a coffee table!
How could you even ask?

Keep longing, fella:
"Take a part of the slopes home and keep longing for next season with this unique and useful table!"

1 comment:

  1. Hi Rebecca,
    This is Grant from iron Alterations (the guy who created and is selling this board). I was alerted to this post and felt I'd chime in on a few points.

    While I am currently stationed in Texas, I started skiing, moving onto snowboarding from the age of three and have done so regularly (now 26) despite living in TX now which allows me to travel to Whistler BC and New Mexico to continue my passion. Therefore, I did not, to paraphrase "fail at an extreme sport and get told to stop by my wife". As for the legs, they are not "crappy hardware store legs" and came from an antique/salvage store in TX. They are antique true Eames style. I will say that I have sold a few of these boards (not on etsy) and people seem to really like them.

    I'm sorry this table ruffled your feathers so greatly you felt the need to speak so harshly on your blog. With anything available for sale (on etsy or otherwise) it comes down to personal preference and taste. I will admit I have seen a few items on there that I thought were downright hideous or just not my style. Unlike you and others I tend to keep my negative opinions to myself because hey... someone out there will appreciate it for what it is and if they don't, they are not obligated to purchase them.

    Almost all of my furniture, light fixtures, etc is created from repurposed, salvaged, ot otherwise vintage materiel (ALA upcycling). I have a true passion in turning oddball "stuff" into other "oddball stuff" that makes you wonder "how the hell did he come up with that". I am an honest, hardworking man and do not wish to hoodwink anyone with my creations. They are what they are and built by hand in my small workshop behind my home.

    Everyone is entitled to his/her opinion and to share as needed and I understand/appreciate that freedom we enjoy in the United States of America.
    With that being said, hopefully in the future you will be kinder to other upcoming artists out there on your blog.

    Thanks for the opportunity to respond, and have a great week!

    -Grant from Iron Alterations


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